I can't explain it. It is something you have either felt or you haven't. There are no words to describe the desire to have another child. It's like a little piece of your heart is missing and you suddenly have this overwhelming need to fill it. Somehow or another you know the time is right. It is that time for us. I can't explain it. I just feel like there is this little person out there waiting on us.
The difference for us, as for so many of our friends, is that we can't decide that we want another baby and then start trying and get pregnant and nine months later have our child. It just isn't that way with us. We have a whole different type of pregnancy. :) It is one of varying length...could be a few weeks, could be years. There are a whole different type of questions and circumstances when it comes to adoption. The whole experience is just different. Not in a bad way, necessarily, just different.
So, back to the desire. I am ready. Brent is ready. I am ready now, today, this moment. I want to hear the baby fussing for me in the other room. I want to make bottles and wash newborn clothes. I want to go shopping for a new infant car seat and newborn diapers and tiny socks. I want to sit on the couch and stare at him or her and be in total awe. I want to see the reactions that Collin, Tyler and Emmalee will have to their new little sibling. I want to see Brent holding our child for the first time. I want, I want, I want.....I ache.
I also picture this beautiful child in my mind and always picture another baby with Down syndrome. I know we are meant to adopt another one with that little something extra. I am thrilled and humbled. I pray that I am worthy for another little angel. I pray they come quickly.
The journey continues.....
6 comments:
I just came to your blog via Rebecca's (The Quiet Storm) and wanted to say hello! I have a 10 month old son with Down syndrome named Joey. I can't wait to read more!
I just found your blog through Rebecca's and I had to comment! I have a son and two little girls who were both adopted (and both have Down syndrome). My youngest daughter shares a name with your daughter! I was excited to see that! Enjoy your day!
Oh I know know know the ache. and I know, not as a mom, but as someone touched throughout my life, what you mean by that something extra! Praying for ya Jodie and Brent and your whole family!!!
yeah, jodie!!!
i've only been a mom for 25 days and i already have the beginnings of the ache! i'm having so much fun i KNOW i want to do this again! your baby is so lucky to have a mom like you waiting on him/her. i hope you become a family of 6 soon!
:) Gen
OOOOHHHHH I know that ache! Currently trying to stifle it until our bundle of joy can find his/her way into our home- not just our hearts!
Prayers for us both!
I absolutely agree about having the deep intense desire in our hearts in having another child.. I am feeling it also and look forward to the day our baby is with us!
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