31 for 21, Day 5

31 for 21, Day 4

I love the pictures that I posted yesterday. They are so Tyler. My friend Shelly took them and she truly captured his personality. Tyler LOVES to make people smile and laugh and he has several facial expressions that he uses to get a response. The first and second pictures are so "Classic Tyler" -- one eyebrow raised, a bit of a goofy grin. I love it!

When I made the appointment for these pictures, Brent and I really debated about whether or not we should get Ty's hair cut beforehand. His hair was pretty wild, as you can see. It was uneven and super messy. In the end, we opted not to cut it first. Why? This is the most hair Tyler had had in two years.

For those of you that don't know, Tyler was diagnosed with Acute Lymphoblastic Leukemia, or ALL, on March 2, 2008. He started losing his hair pretty quickly after treatment began. His hair began falling out in giant clumps. I finally ended up shaving his head in the hospital. It was one of the most heartbreaking things I have ever had to do. When his hair started falling out, it was the first physical sign that he had cancer. It finally started to sink in that he was sick. His hair loss was much more difficult than I imagined it would be.

Thankfully Tyler is now cancer free. He is also finished with treatment. His hair has finally started growing in properly and he has had several hair cuts since these photos were taken.

When I look at these photos I am so happy that we decided not to cut his hair first. His hair is a sign of how far he has come. These pictures will always be a reminder that Tyler triumphed over cancer.

31 for 21, Day 3

31 for 21, Day 2

I think one of the greatest myths regarding people with Down syndrome is that they are always happy. I can be completely honest here when I tell you that that is not true. Tyler is not always happy. He is just like any other six year old. Granted, he is happy much of the time. But he also gets frustrated, angry, sad, scared, disappointed, overwhelmed and every other emotion you can think of.

The fact is, people with Down syndrome are more like everyone else than they are different. They love, they hate, they have fears, they have joys, they laugh, they cry. More than anything, they want to be included and treated fairly. As Tyler's mom, I want that for him more than anything else.

On my sidebar I have the Down Syndrome Creed posted. I think of this often. I know that Tyler will do all the things that other kids do. I know he is capable. I know that he will succeed. I also know that he will do it at his own pace. It may take him longer and that's okay. I am excited to enjoy the journey right along with him!

Happy Down Syndrome Awareness Month! 31 For 21, Day 1

Hooray! 31 for 21 is here! I am really hoping for two things by committing to blogging each day this month.

1. That I can help to make others more aware of Down syndrome in general.

2. That I don't bore everyone to death.

The rules of 31 for 21 are pretty open. You don't have to blog about Down syndrome specifically every day if you don't want to. I'm glad for that rule but I am really hoping to have something pertaining to Down syndrome every day, even if it is just a picture of Tyler.

I would love topic ideas from all of you. Is there anything about Tyler that you'd like to know? Are you curious why we chose to adopt a child with Down syndrome? Do you have questions about Down syndrome in general? Please, ask away!

I am really looking forward to this month of posts. I am also looking forward to reading the other blogs that have also committed to 31 for 21. I LOVE connecting with other families.

Wish me luck!!

31 for 21

I have seen the 31 for 21 blog challenge the past couple of years and always think I will commit to doing it. And then I don't. This year I decided to step it up and make the commitment.

What is 31 for 21? Well, October is Down syndrome awareness month. Down syndrome is also known as Trisomy 21. So, 31 for 21 is 31 days in October to blog about Down syndrome. Hooray!

I am excited to share more about Down syndrome on my blog and to blog more often in general. So watch out....you all may get real sick of me by the time the month is over.

Grab This Button

Things NOT to ask adoptive parents.....

I saw this post today on another blog and just had to share it. Yes, we have been asked many of these questions. Not only are thy inappropriate, they are hurtful. I know most people mean no harm but it can be very frustrating. I LOVE to talk about adoption, especially with those who are genuinely interested. However, I don't like being asked silly questions by total strangers, especially in front of my children.

As adoptive parents to children with special needs, it seems that the questions are even more inappropriate. If I don't know you personally, it isn't your business. End of discussion.

There are some things that I know for sure. I know that we are blessed with three amazing children. I know that adoption is a miracle! I know that our children were meant to be in our family. I know that all of the years struggling with infertility, all of the tears, all of the fear and worry that we would never be parents, all of the heartache and pain and agony -- it was all worth it. These children, these amazing children, are ours in every sense of the word. No, they are not flesh of my flesh or bone of my bone but they are miraculously my own. No, they didn't grow under my heart. But they grew in it. I can not imagine our lives without these incredible children. I am truly blessed to be their mother.

Conversation with Emmalee

Emmalee: "Mom, what happens if you die first?" Me: "Then dad will take care of you." Em: "Oh, so what happens if dad dies first?" Me: "Then I'll take care of you." Long pause.....Em: "Huh, I sure hope you die first."

Nice to know how I rank around here! I couldn't help but laugh. She is too much!

Moving On.....

No doubt about it, I really should be sleeping. It is now 4:40 in the morning and I have my alarm set for 6:30. The movers will be here at 8:30. I still have things to pack up and get the children situated for the day. And yet, I simply can't sleep.

This is the last night in this house. The last time I will sit in my too small kitchen writing a blog post. The last time I will sleep in my too small bedroom. The last time I will wish we had more space, more bathrooms, bigger bedrooms. The last time I will complain about how much I hate hardwood floors. The Gardner family is moving on.

I am really excited about the new place. It has all the things this house doesn't -- larger bedrooms, a master bathroom, the laundry room on the upper level next to the bedrooms. It has carpet, a larger dining area for our table, a much quieter neighborhood, a double garage. Really, it is everything we want.

But this house......oh this too small house. I love this house. We have so many memories here. We have been here for four years.....four years today, in fact. Tyler had just turned two when we moved here and Emmalee was fifteen months. They were babies.

We knew right away the house was too small for us. We decided it would be fine for a year and at the end of our lease we would move on. And then life happened and we simply couldn't bring ourselves to leave the comfort of our little house.

I can't even begin to remember all the amazing events that have happened in this house. Tyler learned to walk here. Emmalee grew so much that she could finally see out the living room window. We got the call about Nathaniel in this house and we brought him home to this house. This is really the only house our children have ever known.

We've celebrated four Christmases, four anniversaries and several birthdays here. We had movie nights and friends over for dinner and had so much joy here. This house has become so much more than just a house. This house is now a home. And as much as I complain, as thankful as I am for all the things the new house has, I will truly miss this little home. I pray we can be as happy in our new house as we have been here.

Tyler

Tyler has his final bone marrow biopsy tomorrow morning. I can scarcely believe that we have completed two years of treatment already. In some ways it seems like only yesterday that we received the horrible news that Tyler had leukemia. In other ways it seems as though this two years has dragged on forever.

Tyler has been cancer free for quite some time. This is an incredible blessing! We are praying that his bone marrow will continue to be free of cancer and that this nightmare is truly behind us.

Please pray that Tyler will do well, that his bone marrow will be free of cancer and that Brent & I will have peace and comfort.

There will never be enough words to say thank you to each of you for your love and support over the past two years. Each one of you have been a blessing in our lives, have stood beside us and loved us. The love and support we have received have been essential in getting us through this. The prayers have been heard and felt. There is no way we could have done this without all of you!!

Please continue to pray for our little friends who are still fighting. Please pray for the families whose children have lost the battle.

We love you all!!

Happy 5th Birthday, Emmalee!

Five years ago today two incredible people made the decision to place their beautiful baby girl for adoption. Not a day goes by that we don't think of them, pray for them and thank our Heavenly Father for the awesome miracle of adoption! We are truly thankful to be Emmalee's parents and we will always love you R & M.

Emma-Ism

Last night Emmalee, Nathaniel and I trekked out to the urgent care so we could all be seen by the doctor. We are feeling lousy. Anyway, Nate fell asleep in my arms and Emmalee looked over at him and lovingly said, "poor Nate, his batteries ran down."

Oh Emmalee!

I love the funny things that girl says. She sure makes us laugh!

Emmalee was awake in the middle of the night a few nights ago. I happened to be sleeping on the couch because I've had a horrible cold and couldn't stop coughing. She came out to the living room and snuggled up with me. She asked me to tell her a story. There's one she really likes. It is "The Itsy Bitsy Spider" as told by Iza Trapani. (Incidentally, if you've never heard of Iza Trapani, you simply must check her out.)

At any rate, I recited the story for Em. The last line talks about the spider resting in the sun. In the book, the spider is wearing sun glasses and relaxing on her web. I told Emmalee how cool it would be if spiders really wore sunglasses and relaxed like that. She got very offended and said "Mom, you know nothing about nature!"

I love you, Emmalee!

Nate The Great

My friend Shelly did some cute pics of Nate. He was less enthusiastic than Emmalee but I LOVE them. The first one is my favorite. :)

Beautiful Emmalee

My amazing friend Shelly took these pictures. I am in love with them. I love how she was able to capture Emmalee's personality. I love that they are fun and unique. She is going to do some of Tyler in April and I can't wait! Thanks again, Shelly!